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8 Facts of My Week (3)

1. Dear English Teacher,

Please write legibly. Specifically, please stop making your "OK"s look like "OIC", because then I think you're trying to say "oh, I see". Also, it would maybe help your handwriting if you stopped making just the first three letters of every word distinct and then letting the rest dissolve into scribbles. You are writing words, not making a signature.

(I must thank you for my essay grade, however. I did not expect that.)

Sincerely,
That girl who ran around the hallways in bliss because she thought she was failing English when really she's failing History instead.

2. Dear History Teacher,

Please stop talking too fast when you teach. I am drowning and my GPA will suffer if I don't get at least an A- in this class. It would also maybe help if your tests weren't so hard. Just a suggestion.

Sincerely,
That girl who sits next to the dude who grunts during the entire class.

3. Dear Bus Driver,

I need your bus for sleep because CERTAIN TEACHERS are giving too much homework. I'd appreciate it if you didn't crank up the rap music as loud as it will go. It would also be helpful if you stopped running over people. The bumps make it even harder to fall asleep.

Sincerely,
That girl who can't even hear her iPod over your music.

4. Dear Heart,

Please stop crushing on that guy. HE DOESN'T LIKE YOU BACK. GET OVER IT.

Sincerely,
That girl whose ribcage you live in.

5. Dear Dinosaurs,

Thank you for existing at one point. If you hadn't, my friend wouldn't have given me those awesome stuffed versions of you guys that say "RAWR" when you squeeze them. They make me happy.

Sincerely,
That girl who likes dinosaurs.

6. Dear Rocket Ship,

Please park yourself outside my house so when I'm stressed, I can climb inside and check out that moon dude. I hear he's pretty nice.

Sincerely,
That girl who wants to take the astronomy elective.

7. Dear Math Homework,

I'm sorry. I can't help you with your problems anymore. They're something you have to deal with yourself.

Sincerely,
That girl who hates doing synthetic geometry, but finds it pretty sexy anyway.

8. Dear WIP,

God knows I love you, but don't you think you could ease up on the plot issues? It'd be a big help.

Sincerely,
That girl who works on you every single day.









2 comments:

Teacher/Learner said...

I had a high school teacher with "signature" handwriting where only the first 2 letters were legible--the rest was literally a line! Usually it's the math or science teachers who have the worst handwriting, but an English teacher?!? Go figure :D

P.S. Love the brain cramp cartoon!

Jo said...

Enjoyed reading this. Sorry about the guy who grunts in class. Makes me think of a person who comes into the library every day and snorts. loudly.

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